My relationship with alcohol: Past & present
This New Year I’m celebrating myself and my recent decision not to drink alcohol.
In the past few years, taking some time off of drinking would be followed by FOMO (Fear of missing out).
No wonder I would ultimately drink again!
NOW, because I’m a life coach and entrepreneur and have done the non-romantic inner-work around self-love and self-worth, when I decided to stop drinking right before Thanksgiving 2019, there was this new inner-grounded-ness in my decision for the first time ever.
This played out as me going to my family party and being offered drinks and me just firmly saying no over and over and not feeling ONE OUNCE of people-pleasing energy.
At the Christmas party, it just so happened my cousin and his wife brought non-alcoholic beer.
I didn’t even know it was an option, so I had tried a few and they tasted just like beer, and at the end of the night, I didn’t stumble down those stairs like I’ve done one thousand times before.
I also knew things had shifted when my cousin gifted me a super-sought after and expensive bottle of bourbon.
After all, we Biesels enjoy a good bottle of bourbon!
After feeling a bit unsure what to say when I opened it, I now look forward to sharing that bottle with guests who come over for super special occasions.
When people asked me why I was drinking fake beer, my answer was simply: Just got tired of feeling like shit. Oh, not to mention the anxiety and depressive moods that would stop by, when there is nothing at all in my life to be depressed about!
I love my family and I want them to live long, healthy lives.
My aunts and uncles lived hard and died too soon as a result. (Only 3 out of 8 of my dads brothers and sisters are still alive.)
They each had larger-than-life personalities, and like me in my twenties, didn’t do anything in moderation.
There is a now raw, gaping void at the parties in their absence.
Our family can’t afford to lose any more members!
I see my younger cousins drinking and I really hope they are curious to find out who they are without the drinks.
The benefits of not drinking are hard to describe in words, but I’ll try:
A general lift in mood
Fewer dark thoughts and depressive moods that come and visit
A general lift in all-day energy
Much better sleep
A total leveling of my mood swings and PMS symptoms and anxiety
...and it’s only been about 2+ months!
I just am seriously excited to see how all this positive escalates over the next decade.
I recently read that we can make an addiction out of any activity that we use to avoid or escape.
So for you, my friend, I wish you the next decade of listening to your internal guidance about the patterns you have a hunch aren’t good for you.
We are what we do daily, so choose those habits wisely and trust yourself once you decide what to do about them.
May you have peace and a firm grounded-ness in your decision to feel better.